I had a similar experience and my friend also told me she hated me. I also felt glad that we didn't reconnect in the end. I wrote about it last year. I was a bit stalkerish like you! It was almost embarrassing to admit. :) Anyway, if you're interested, here's mine. https://medium.com/know-thyself-heal-thyself/an-old-friend-told-me-she-hated-me-im-glad-29d76827b46f

Also, I don't believe she hated you the whole time. If you enjoyed laughs and holidays, I'm sure they were genuine. She'd just had enough. Frankly, I'd had enough of my friend when it ended, too.