I don't think it's out of line. I've queried why someone thought an encounter was racist because it mirrored an encounter I'd had too. She explained why and I don't think she minded me asking. In that instance, it was more about a general undertone of things that had gone on before with the person, rather than the specific encounter. It was interesting for me to hear.

This post will make me think twice before querying it again though!

But honestly, my husband and I question our own interpretations of how people behave. Because sometimes people have misunderstandings, we read things wrong. Perhaps someone didn't mean to be an ass. Or I took something totally the wrong way. You know, it's part of being human.